Sunday, May 2
There was no great excitement today, but we did hear a couple of great sermons at Yantis First Baptist Church…David was in rare form and delivered just the messages we needed to hear.
After Sunday school and church this morning, we drove back to Holiday Village, had takeout lunch from the clubhouse, and ate lunch in Big V while watching another episode of 2 ½ Men.
After a short nap I went outside to water the plants and do some minor work around the lot. Several branches and limbs fell during the storms last weekend and I finally got around to picking them up and moving them to the woodpile. Barbara wasn’t feeling well, so she stayed inside to rest and read a book.
As we were getting ready to leave for choir practice and the evening sermon, Bob Royar rolled up in his golf cart. He had loaned me his 20-foot extension ladder last week but needed it back for some work at his place. I hopped on the golf cart and held on to the ladder while Bob drove back to their lot as Barbara drove over in the Vibe.
Barbara and I then drove to Yantis and I went to choir practice while she returned to Big V to pick up the leftovers from lunch.
David was spot on again this evening with his message taken from Philippians 1; 21-26. It seemed to hit us at just the right time, proving once again that we are just where we are supposed to be.
When we returned to Mother’s house we sat down and watched the Extreme Makeover show that was taped here in Mineola a couple of months ago. It was a very interesting show and we got a different perspective on the family that what we got from the local and regional media.
Monday, May 3
Barbara: Laundry seemed to be an all day affair today for some reason. Maybe I was just in slow motion! However, we also tackled the general housecleaning which tends to divide one’s time and attention. During this process, we were delighted to receive an unexpected visit from our friend Carolyn who was making a Wal-Mart run when she decided to take a short detour to check on us. Her visit was certainly a welcome break from the humdrum of indoor work that neither Jim nor I seem to readily adapt to!
Once Jim’s part of the indoor chores were finished, he headed outside to “play” in the yard while I got things ready for lunch and did some paperwork which needed attention.
Tonight we received two messages which brought different emotions to the surface. First, was a call from a friend of Jimmy’s who had gone to visit him the night before. Jimmy is blessed to have 3 really dedicated friends who continue to stand by him during this difficult time and who are willing to keep us informed on how he’s doing. Words alone cannot begin to express our thankfulness to them for being so steadfast. The second news was much more painful as Jim received word via email that Max’s wife Marion had finished her three-fold and five year long battle with rheumatoid arthritis, osteoarthritis and pulmonary fibrosis. In a very short note Max wrote, “Marion Johnson completed her journey at 7:36 pm today.”
We’ve written several times about Max and Marion and will write more at another time, but tonight the words are overpowered by our great love for this couple and their family and conflicting emotions about how Marion’s journey ended.
Tuesday, May 4
Barbara: Nothing particular stands out this morning. However, while TJ, Edith, Jim, and I were having a really late lunch…just couldn’t seem to get every pulled together earlier…we were pleased to find Michelle and Gene stopping by for a short visit. They joined us around the table (though no amount of wheedling could convince them to join us in eating or even dessert!) for a lively bit of conversation. With their trips to Kansas and our unexpected jaunts, we haven’t seen much of each other.
We did find out this afternoon that Marion’s service would be held Thursday in Santa Fe and another one Saturday in Artesia. Therefore, we began making plans to attend the Saturday service. First on our lists of things to do was to contact Cathey and see if we could visit Jaycie for an hour on our way back from NM even though it was Mother’s Day.
There were many things to do in preparation for another trip, but since it was Bridge night, we decided that there was always tomorrow!
While I went to Bridge, Jim tackled the mowing and trimming of Our Little Lot.
Wednesday, May 5
Even though we had a million things needing to be done, we decided that nothing was more important than Barbara going to Bible Study and Jim working out at Our Little Lot! Talk about priorities!
Once back in Mineola, the work began in earnest for both Jim and me. Mine was to prepare meals that Edith could have with a minimum amount of preparation for breakfast and dinner since TJ always takes care of her lunches. First, was to use the zucchini we had bought from the Tomato Patch last week by making zucchini bread. Then I fixed chicken salad while Jim washed the car and got it prepared for another flying trip.
We did hear from Cathey offering to let us visit with Jaycie on Friday evening. However, since the funeral was in Artesia on Saturday and Jim was planning to visit with Max’s family on Friday night, this could not be an option for us. Jim did email Cathey with an explanation of our situation and a request to see Jaycie for an hour Sunday evening, but to no avail.
Thursday, May 6
This morning began with Jim taking the Vibe to Wal-Mart to be serviced and me packing our bags in preparation for the trip. During this time, I received a call from Gary, the head of East Texas Ministries for the penal system. He had been contacted though our friends Gene and Michelle about finding someone in the Lubbock area to minister to Jimmy. We continue to be amazed and blessed with God’s Hand throughout this ordeal!
TJ had asked us earlier in the week to bring Edith over today for lunch so rather than cancel, we decided that we’d do that and then drive partway to NM, which would be a little easier on us old folks (we just don’t do 10-hour trips very well anymore!)
Finally around 2:00 we had Edith settled down in her home and we pointed the Vibe in a westerly direction once again.
Our friend in Abilene, Dandy, had left this morning for a jaunt to Lake Anna in Virginia to spend Mother’s Day with her daughter and family at their lake home (same lake our friends Rod and Ruth live on…small world! But, Rod & Ruth are in New Hampshire now volunteering, so there is no chance for Dandy and them to meet). So, Jim and I found a motel on the interstate and called our travels to a halt around 7:00.
After walking to Subway for an evening meal, we decided we had had all the fun we could have for one day and headed for bed as we wanted to be up early tomorrow.
Friday, May 7
Our plans for an early start didn’t quite make it to fruition, but we still arrived in Hobbs in time to go by Susie’s house to visit with her. She suggested that we have lunch with James and her at a favorite local restaurant of theirs before we continued our journey. Since we haven’t seen James in quite a while, this sounded good to us!
We got to Artesia in time to drop by the funeral home to check in with Jean and Jerry before heading out to Jean’s to unpack. Once the car was unloaded, I quickly headed back into town to meet my sister Carol at Ruth’s for a short visit. Carol was in town since she was spending Mother’s Day with her daughters Connie and Theresa and their families out at Loco Hills (small dot in the road outside of Artesia).
Once at Ruth’s I was delighted to find that not only Carol was there to greet me, but also her daughters Teresa and Connie as well as Teresa’s daughter, Tamara, and Connie’s son Barney. So…for a while it was old home week! Finally, we shooed the kids away so that Carol and I could have some alone visiting time.
Jim: While the girls were having their “hen party,” I stayed at Jean’s house to rest and check email. I did call my brother Jerry in Roswell to invite Jane and him to come to Artesia tomorrow morning for coffee/breakfast and some chit-chat, but Jerry said that they were expecting an appliance repairman at their house tomorrow morning and didn’t think they could make it. I told him that I guessed we’d just have to meet up another time since the 600-mile trip and the schedule for tomorrow wouldn’t allow for the 35-mile trip to Roswell.
I also called Max to find out where he was and when he expected to be in Artesia tonight. Jerry Terpening had already told me that Max was bringing his motorhome for this trip and would be staying around for several days next week. Max was about three hours away from Artesia and had his grandson and godson with him; he promised to give me a call as soon as he got to Artesia and had the motorhome set up at the local RV park.
Barbara: After a short rest period, I got up and joined Jean and Jim as we all waited for Becky, Jerry, and Nancy to arrive since we were all going to La Fonda for supper. As always, the food was good and the conversation never lagged.
Jim: Max called as we were entering La Fonda with the family. Since he and his family were going to another restaurant to eat, we agreed that I’d just go out to the RV park when we finished eating and got back to Jean’s place.
Max was by himself when I got to his motorhome and we spent about three hours reminiscing about Marion and years past. I’ve mentioned in earlier writings that Max and I go back to the time when I was in junior high band and he was in the high school band. Through summer band activities and, I’m sure at the suggestion of our band director, Mr. Bradbury, Max took me under his wing and guided me to the high school band experience, even as he was preparing to go off to ENMU as a music major.
When I graduated and went to ENMU, Max was there and again served as a mentor and guide (and sometimes as the social director, but that’s another story). I even traveled to Borger, Texas, with Max when he interviewed (and got) his first band director job at Borger Junior High.
Max met Marion in El Paso during a summer session when he was taking the dreaded Texas Government and Texas Constitution courses at UTEP (then Texas Western College) to complete the requirements for a Texas teaching certificate. He introduced Marion to me shortly after that, so in truth I’ve known Marion almost as long as Max has, and even served as an usher at their wedding in El Paso just a few days before I entered the USAF. Over the years we have kept in touch through the many moves and job changes that we have each experienced.
Marion was a very talented and special person…far more intelligent than Max and I put together, but such a kind and loving lady who accepted each person she met as a new friend.
One of Max’s sons and a grandson came back to the motorhome after three hours of our talking. We didn’t realize how late it was, but with a full day ahead of both of us tomorrow, we decided it was time to end the day and for me to return to Jean’s house for the night.
Saturday, May 8
Something that I failed to mention in yesterday’s entry was that when Jean got home from work at the funeral home yesterday, she asked me if I was the one who had talked about the Banister family. I told her that it probably was me because the Banisters were our next door neighbors when we moved into town back in 1954 and I continued to try to see Mrs. Banister whenever I was in town.
Jean then told me that they had been called to come to the hospital late this afternoon to pick up a Mrs. Banister, but since there are several families in town by that name, she didn’t know which one it was. Later, Jerry and I went to the funeral home office to check the file and sure enough, it was our neighbor and close family friend, Geri Banister, who had passed away yesterday. John, her husband, died several years ago while I was assistant principal at Liberal High School and I took time off to return to Artesia for the funeral because John and Geri were second parents to me. Unfortunately, I would not be able to attend this funeral as it will be next week sometime and we have to return to Mineola.
I did find that the Banister’s daughter, Marysue, would be at the funeral home this morning, so I went to the office and got to see her for a few minutes and give her condolences from our family.
1954…That was back in the days when every adult in the neighborhood had authority over every kid in the neighborhood…doors were rarely ever locked, and it wasn’t unusual for neighbors to give just a cursory knock on the front door before letting themselves in to someone else’s house (after announcing themselves, of course). The Banisters had three boys when we moved there and there were three boys of similar ages in our family, so it was only natural that we would all team up. Visitors to the neighborhood didn’t know whether we were six brothers or if we came from two different families.
When Marysue was born, she was the first girl in the neighborhood and nobody knew what to do with her, so we all treated her like our baby sister until she was old enough to be one of the guys.
After returning to Jean’s house from the funeral home, I called Johnny, the oldest of the Banister boys (my age) and talked to him for a few minutes. He and his wife live in Mississippi and were planning to leave tomorrow morning to return to Artesia for a few days. I asked if they were going to try to drive straight through, and he said that they would split the trip up and stay with an aunt and uncle (his mother’s oldest brother) in Mineola tomorrow night…talk about a small world! Not only that, Johnny’s aunt and uncle live only a couple of minutes from Mother’s house!
Barbara and I had already decided (after talking to Mother Friday night) that we needed to leave town after Marion’s memorial service and get back to Mother’s house as soon as possible rather than extending this trip an extra day by going to Lubbock, so Johnny and I agreed that we’d try to get together for at least a few minutes tomorrow night after we returned to Mineola.
Jerry and Nancy had invited us over for a cookout tonight, but because we needed to get back to Mother’s house and because it was a 600-mile drive, we called Nancy and begged off, telling her we would leave town immediately after the memorial service and drive as far as we could tonight and then go the rest of the way tomorrow. Everyone understood the situation and wished us well on our travels.
Marion’s service was conducted at the local Episcopal Church, the church that she and the boys had attended when they lived in Artesia. The officiating priest is now retired, but had served as the priest at the time; in fact, Marion had been his warden (which I don’t understand), evidently a part of the lay bureaucracy in the local church.
Father Herb delivered a beautiful, if somewhat offbeat service. It was obvious to all in attendance that he knew Marion very well as he captured her very essence in all he said about her. It was truly a celebration of Marion’s life and faith and those of us gathered there alternately cried (a little) and laughed (a lot) as Father Herb told the stories about her.
In the end, those of us who knew Marion the best felt that we were even closer to her than ever before. Marion touched so many people through her life, her talents, and her work. She was a beautiful and gracious lady, a wonderful wife to Max, and a doting mother and grandmother, and a lifelong friend to those who called her a friend. All who came in contact with her were changed for the better.
When the service was ended and we had visited with others around us, we once again hopped in the Vibe and headed out of Artesia, hoping to get as many miles as possible behind us before we had to stop for the night.
All went well until we got to the end of the cutoff road that goes from near Loco Hills to the Hobbs/Carlsbad highway. (Sister-in-law Carol who was returning from Hobbs with her family and Barbara texted each other along the way, as we were sure to pass them. She also warned us that there had been a wreck near the cut-off.) However, as we got to the final mile marker on the cutoff road, we could see cars and trucks lined up ahead of us and on the main highway leading to Hobbs…something B-I-G was going on.
When we got even closer, we saw every imaginable law enforcement and emergency vehicle, including a helicopter, smack dab in the middle of the part of the highway in the direction we needed to drive. After a few minutes, I made the executive decision to turn around and take an old (but paved) oilfield road that Ernie had taken me on once upon a time. Barbara was opposed to the idea and was certain we were going to end up in Lovington, but after following the meandering road for about 45 minutes, we were right where I thought we should be and were soon headed to and through Hobbs on our way toward the Texas border.
We stopped in Seminole, Texas, for a McMeal to go and ate on the way to Lamesa. We had wanted to go as far as Big Spring tonight, but the detour we took earlier used up a lot of our travel time, so we stopped in Lamesa to shop around for a place to spend the night. Our first stop was at a fairly new, but way overpriced Best Western. After hearing their rates, we drove toward the south end of town and found a very clean and reasonably priced (less than half of the Best Western) motel that was reminiscent of the tourist courts of our (much) earlier days.
With our stomachs full and a clean and comfortable place to lay our heads, we settled in for some reading time and a good night’s sleep.
“Life is not the way it's supposed to be. It's the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.” - Unknown
From Lamesa in the great South Plains of Texas,
Jim/Dad/Gramps & Barbara/Mom/Grams
